also these motivation speakers. seems to be more of a help then a preacher. I will detach and silence as I am alive and just note for 100 dollars check is all I want from her. store your own your own I'm just getting eggs and rice bread butter and ice creams and cheeses if need to and Gatorade drinks.of I get food stamps again if not I guess I'll save and just get drinks and my pm pills. didn't ask for these parents or to be here it takes more then just a biological parent should have put me up for adoption or abortion o could have had a chance for a better life instead here causef me to be homeless again several times don't even trust that I'm on the ML account also not sure guaranteed for the house life insurance whatever if not then I will be in little house period. here I am still surviving and hanging on for God certainly not her by no means what so ever just a biological type mom my true family was nanny so only way to come to terms with this so called parent is just being a helper cause my true mom o considered was nanny they were more for CP Matter what he did . even a murderer or a rapist still got more love acceptamce and care from their mothers and fathers but me I don't do anything if that and wouldn't and I get not even care or love it's just fake and phony well I can play that too. I keep asking why can't God take me now but he just isn't answering that same with why can't you take now this phony biological mom o don't even want to call her that she's not she has ruined any chance of me having a normal life. no wonder I couldn't be a good mom to the babies I lost and one have maybe the nursing home would be where she should go but the house and definitely little house is mine period there's just no communication non what so ever so to give me peace till I die only way I know to is detach and silence and walk away when it gets in heated moment

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