do I really have a family really

Do I really have family seems to me no everyone against me seems but it doesn't really bother me because I'm dying just doesn't seem soon enough. My mother says still have her but don't really know about that either times she's thrown my stuff away or taking a table out of my room or whatever it maybe. To me it's a family member that i work for doing the home manager jobs, security for neighborhood hair cutter, cook light housekeeping duties, caregiver duties secretary, personal shopper. That seems to make it a little easier to live in this world knowing in my heart I don't want to at all and if I had a gun I would use it on myself. Knowing I should not even been born I am a mistake through and through the mental gets worse and worse most of it is hidden inside is my mom going to plug in the phone or is it broken since been unplugged or is she hurt, sick, or worse hopefully I can get her tomorrow or before I check out on 4/11. Or 4/13 if get points plus cash hopefully soon. I've tried to call several times and it just rung and rung 

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